Yesterday I walked into work and there was a note from my boss on some paperwok that had a minor error on it and he was chewing me out for it. I had been so stressed the night before and woke up stressed and that was the key to turning the faucet on and I couldn't get it to turn off. I went to the restroom and cried a little, washed my face and came back and someone asked me if I was ok and the tears started again. I left for the restroom again and two of the ladies from my dept were coming in and they asked if I was ok and I just shrugged the one turned around and said she was following me. She went to the lounge with me and sat and put her arm around me and I vented and sobbed and then she left me alone. I washed my face, went back to my desk and my boss came out and said we had a meeting then asked if I was ok and asked if I was upset about his note and the tears started again. I apologized for the tears and said I couldn't do the meeting and I left for the restroom for third time. This time I couldn't shut the tears off so I went in and got my coat and left a note on my coworkers desk to tell my boss I went for a walk (I was afraid he'd think I quit). I walked around the ADN property for 1/2 hour just sobbing and crying out to God, The stress from home, church and work had gotten the best of me and I was pleading with God to release it...show me if I should quit. Though I couldn't get the tears to totally subside I heard His voice telling me He was there for me and He would get me through! I finally headed back the office. My coworker asked if I was ok and I just asked to give me time. I considered going home but I had work to do and I wouldn't be able to stop crying long enough to explain it...so I absorbed myself in my work and the tears finally stopped. Several were so sweet throughout the day. My poor boss didn't know what to do with me...
But back to my headline...the sun actually did shine. It was a beautiful day and then as we were dealing with a bad copy of an ad we looked out the window and the most awesome sunset. I wished Jenna was there with her "forever in your face" camra ~smile~ as the sky looked like it was on fire. So the day started in an emotional storm but ended with a gorgeous sunset. Thank you Lord! But please don't let the rain come like that ever again!
Thursday, February 01, 2007
Sunshine and Sunsets
Posted by J Nowling at 1:32 AM
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4 comments:
I am so sorry that you had such a rough day. Isn't it wonderful though, to have God reassure us, in those awful moments, that He is right beside us and will see us through whatever we are facing?! If you were to look back, I'm guessing, for a while yesterday, there was only ONE set of footprints. ~smile~
Sister Tammi is right about that one set of prints. I KNOW He is carrying you. You have sacrificed so much and I know He sees it all. My heart really goes out to you with all this going on and I'm surely praying. The enemy is trying so hard to discourage everywhere. He has tried to just make me give up because all of the people I have worked so hard with have just given up and left the Lord. He would love it if I would too. My daughter just drains me and I have had to use the Word to fight this depression. The sword of the word is the only thing that cuts through it. We all just have to keep looking for silver linings (like your sunset) and it's always there. One of my new granddaughters is even named Silver! I only saw her once but am going to see her tomorrow again if the Lord helps me. Anyway, just hang in there and know that even though you are far away, you aren't out of mind and prayers. I remember my friend Jeanette talking about a Jackie at Des Moines...is that the same one? Is she related to Sis. Brenda? I guess it's a given that she stay with you since her name starts with a "J"....hey, that means I can come live with you too...after the snow melts...ha! Hugs from NC!
Thank you my dear sisters. Please pray for Joleesa.
Yes Jackie is the one that Jeanetter spoke about. She is not "technically" related to Sis. Brenda or by way of her mother's first husband. We've always teased her before about fitting in because of her name. She has stayed with us before but this time she has a boyfriend here...3 girls and their guy "problems" have been quite enough but now a fourth. I really do need help. I actually do need to get my head examined.
Sis. Tammi as I was walking the Daily News property in the snow, I sure carried on a conversation with Him and I kept reminding myself of the message I preached Sunday morning about "Listening" to Him and not just "crying" out so that's what I tried to do. I didn't HEAR Him but I sure felt Him.
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